One of my dearest friends had her wedding reception at the OMNI Hotel in Miami, Florida.  She planned the event herself and her choices in dress, flowers, band, everything, were flawless.  She’s not a control freak, she just had little help with the planning because all her friends and family lived out of state.  When she felt overwhelmed with the planning, she would call me in a panic and practically have a nervous breakdown on the phone.  My advice to her was to make lists.  You can’t get everything done in a week.  Prioritize and make lists.   Schedule what needs to be done and when it needs to be done.  Kim, sweetie, I’d say, first thing’s first.  Right now, it doesn’t matter that Aunt Rita is allergic to carrot cake.  Let’s decide on cake flavors after you’ve made the guest list-waaay after.  Foooocus.  Fooocus.  Stay with me now.  Besides, Aunt Rita might not even be on the list when you get done with it.  In which case, bring on the carrot cake!

Even though I was 2000 miles away, as one of her bridesmaids, there was a list that I could make and take responsibility for-the wedding day emergency kit.  I hoped she would remember her dress, veil, shoes, undergarments, etc. without my assistance, but I wanted to relieve a little bit of stress by gathering up those little things that she and her bridesmaids just might need on her wedding day.  So I bought a little case in which to put the little treasures and I named it ‘Justin’, ‘Justin Case’.  I secretly called it Justin Timberlake Case, but I digress. 

On Kim’s wedding day, Justin was called upon on more than one occasion.  It was like he was my personal valet.  Justin, my earring just fell out.  Fetch me an earring back, please.  Or Justin, the bride snagged her panty hose.  Fetch me some clear fingernail polish, please.   J.T.C. proved to be very prepared, and very reliable. 

Here are some things to help you get started when creating your Justin Case:

Earring backs

Clear nail polish

Batteries  -  all sizes

Aspirin/Ibuprofen

Tape – Scotch/duct

Sewing kit

Scissors

Static spray

Panty hose

Safety pins – all sizes

Umbrella

Bobby pins

Bandaids

Nail polish (bride’s color especially)

Nail polish remover

Feminine products

Disposable Razors

Iron

Mints

Cash/quarters (vending machine, parking meters)

 One last thing, and I wouldn’t recommend mentioning that you included this or the bride might freak: smelling salts.  Enough said.

 I’m pleased to report that the bride and groom got hitched without a hitch, due, in part, to Justin.  I did, however, give too much credit to my dear friend, the bride.  While she did remember her dress, veil, and all the other essentials, she forgot to bring clothes to wear the day after the wedding.  So, post wedding day, not wanting to wear her now champagne soaked dress to the complimentary breakfast buffet provided by the OMNI, she donned the clothes her new husband wore to the church the day before – basketball shorts and a t-shirt that said, I’m with stupid.  Lovely, I know. 

 If only she had had a Justin.

In recent years a trend has become common among couples planning their weddings-the use of personal friends and family members to officiate ceremonies.  At first, this may seem like a good idea and is even occasionally promoted in bridal magazines and on the Internet. Unfortunately, many brides and grooms end up regretting this decision once their wedding day arrives.  In order for someone to conduct a beautiful and organized wedding ceremony, that person must have a specific amount of skill, knowledge and experience.

Your wedding officiant must have:

• The experience to organize and coordinate the dozens of details concerning your wedding ceremony. (Including the ability to run an organized rehearsal if necessary).
• Excellent public speaking and communication skills in order to convey the beautiful message of your ceremony to your invited family and friends.
• An extensive knowledge of ceremony styles, formats, options, placement, timing and flow.
• The necessary experience to stay cool, calm and collected when things ‘may not’ be going as planned. And the knowledge of “what to do” when things are “not” going as expected.
• The experience to effectively communicate with all of your other vendors-and to coordinate the ceremony with your DJ, photographer, florist and caterer-allowing everyone to work together and on the “same page” during the wedding ceremony.
• An extensive and detailed understanding of wedding licensing, legal matters, county documents and other important ‘paper work’ issues.

It takes years of training, study and experience to become a good wedding officiant.

Unfortunately, “inexperienced” friends and family members are just that-inexperienced.

However well intentioned, they often do not possess the knowledge, experience or skills necessary to perform the type of wedding ceremony that most brides and grooms want (and expect) on this very special day. Inexperienced friends and family members are often visibly nervous, uncomfortable and ultimately ‘unsure’ of what they are doing-leading to a wedding ceremony which is often ‘not very good.’ Keep in mind that all of this will be taking place in front of your closest friends and family members!

The person officiating your wedding will, simply put, “make” or “break” your ceremony-the centerpiece of your entire wedding day!

If you select an officiant who has years of experience and hundreds, if not thousands of weddings ‘under their belt,’ you will likely have a beautiful ceremony that is professional, organized and memorable in a positive way.

If, on the other hand, you select an officiant that does not have the necessary experience, skills or knowledge to conduct a beautiful and organized ceremony-you may end up wishing you had made a different choice. (Regardless of how special that person is in your life).

So choose your wedding officiant wisely, make sure they have the years of knowledge and experience that will lead to a beautiful and organized wedding ceremony.  You will only have one opportunity to perform this service, so select an officiant who is an experienced professional.